Thursday, September 22, 2011
The trouble with phobias
Simon has a problem. In fact he’s had a problem for so long that it’s
beginning to worry him to death. Finally, he decides he has to do something
about it and goes to see Dr Bloom, his local psychiatrist.
"Oy, doctor, have I got a problem," says Simon. "Every night, when I get
into my bed, I think there's a crazy person under it ready to do me some
serious harm. I'm goingmeshugga with fear. Please help me."
"Don’t worry, Simon," says Dr Bloom, "I can cure you of your fears, but it
will not happen overnight."
"So how long will it take, doctor?" asks Simon.
"Well," replies Dr Bloom, thinking, "come to me twice a week for 3 months
and I’ll rid you of your phobia."
"And how much do you charge a session, doctor?" asks Simon.
“My charges are £100 per session," replies Dr Bloom.
"But that will cost me £2,600 in total," says Simon. "I’m going to have to
think about it and let you know. I can’t easily afford that kind of money."
Many months later, Simon meets Dr Bloom in Waitrose supermarket. "So why
didn't you decide to let me cure you of your fears?" asks Dr Bloom.
"Well," replies Simon, "As I told you then, your fees were really too high
for me. And then my rabbi gave me the cure for nothing. I was so happy to
have saved all that money that I went on a week’s holiday to Tel Aviv."
"So how, may I ask, did your rabbi cure you?" asks Dr Bloom.
"Easy," replies Simon, "he told me to cut the legs off my bed. It’s now so
low that nobody can possible get under it."