The Jewish advisor - joke

 
There once lived a king who had an advisor called Hymie. The king relied so much on the wisdom of Hymie that one day he decided to promote him to chief advisor. But the other advisors objected. 
They said, "It's OK sitting in counsel with a Jew, but to allow him to boss us about would be unacceptable." 
The King accepted their argument and ordered Hymie to convert. Hymie had to obey the King. 
But soon after, Hymie felt great remorse and over the months that followed he became despondent, his health suffered and he grew weak. 
Finally Hymie could take it no longer and made a decision. He went to the king and said, "I was born a Jew and a Jew I will always be. So do whatever you want with me." 
The King had no idea Hymie felt so strong about his 'conversion'. 
"OK," said the King, "if that's how you feel, go be a Jew again. The other advisors will just have to live with it. You're too important for me to lose." 
On his way back home to tell the news to his family, Hymie felt the strength surge back into his body. 
When he arrived, he called out to his wife, "Sarah, we can be Jews again, we can be Jews again." 
Sarah glared at him and said, "Couldn't you wait until after Passover?" 

The convert - Joke

The convert. 
Martin Lewis converts and becomes a priest. 
He give his first Mass in front of a number of high ranking priests who came for the occasion. At the end of the new priest's sermon, a cardinal goes up to congratulate him. "Pastor Lewis," he said, "That was very well done, you were just perfect. But next time, please don't start your sermon with, "Fellow Goyim..." 

Converting a bear

Converting a bear

One day a Priest, a Pastor and a Rabbi were talking. Then suddenly the Priest says "lets see who can convert a bear to their religion".
So the Priest the Pastor and Rabbi all take turns in going into the woods and finding a bear to convert.

First the Priest comes back with some scratches on his face and says " The bear was fierce but as soon as I put some holly water on its head it just stopped".

Then the Pastor comes out with what looks like a broken arm and says "The bear was tackling me to the ground but as soon as we fell into a lake and I baptized it he was calm.

Then, 2 days later, the Priest and the Pastor go to the Hospital to find the Rabbi lying in bed with full body in cast. They asked "What happened?" the Rabbi replies "Maybe circumcision wasn't the best way to start".