Story: Reb Mendel & the Pickpocket

Reb Mendel, a chassid with a long white beard, was arrested for helping to smuggle Jews out of
the former Soviet Union. He sat in a Gulag in Siberia and was housed in a barrack full of
gangsters. The gangsters played cards, a pastime forbidden in the Gulag. So they posted a
watchman at the door and whenever the guards arrived, the alarm was raised and the cards
were hidden.
The prison guards knew about the card games, but try as they might, they could never find the
evidence. The guard would break into the room, search every nook and cranny and somehow
the cards always eluded him. Reb Mendel did his best to watch the gangsters and discover
where the cards were hidden, but he never managed to detect the hiding place.
One day Reb Mendel asked a fellow gangster where the cards were hidden and the gangster
explained the secret. Among us, he said, there is a master pickpocket. We pass the cards to him
and as soon as the guard enters the pickpocket slips them into the guard’s back pocket. The
guard looks everywhere for the cards, but he can’t find them because he already has them.
And, pray tell, asked Reb Mendel, how do you get them back? That’s simple, replied the
gangster. Just before the guard leaves, the pickpocket takes them back.
Whenever Reb Mendel retold this story he would have a good laugh, but then he would sober and
explain the moral. Reb Mendel’s stories always came with a moral. The moral of the story is that when
you criticize others, make sure to check yourself first. You may indeed be the guilty party.

Story: Flowers for mom

A man stopped at a flower shop to order some flowers to be wired to his mother
who lived two hundred miles away.
As he got out of his car he noticed a young girl sitting on the curb sobbing.
He asked her what was wrong and she replied, "I wanted to buy a red rose for my
mother.
But I only have seventy-five cents, and a rose costs two dollars."
The man smiled and said, "Come on in with me. I'll buy you a rose."
He bought the little girl her rose and ordered his own mother's flowers.

As they were leaving he offered the girl a ride home.
She said, "Yes, please! You can take me to my mother."
She directed him to a cemetery, where she placed the rose on a freshly dug grave.
The man returned to the flower shop, canceled the wire order, picked up a bouquet
and drove the two hundred miles to his mother's house.

Joke: A priest was called away for an emergency.

Not wanting to leave the confessional unattended, he called his rabbi friend from across the street and asked him to cover for him. The rabbi told him he wouldn't know what to say, but the priest told him to come on over and he'd stay with him for a little bit and show him what to do.

The rabbi comes and he and the priest are in the confessional. In a few minutes a woman comes in and says "Father forgive me for I have sinned. I committed adultery."

Priest says: "How many times?" Woman: "Three times."

Priest says, "Say two Hail Marys, put $5.00 in the box, and sin no more."

A few minutes later a man enters the confessional. He says, "Father forgive me for I have sinned."

Priest says, "What did you do?" Man says, "I committed adultery."

Priest asks, "How many times?" Man replies, "Three times."

Priest says, "Say two Hail Marys, put $5.00 in the box, and sin no more."

The Rabbi tells the priest that he thinks he's got it so the priest leaves. A few minutes later another woman enters and says, "Father forgive me for I have sinned."

Rabbi says, "What did you do?"

Woman replies, "I committed adultery." Rabbi asks, "How many times?"

Woman says "Once."

Rabbi says, "Go do it two more times, we have a special this week, three for $5.00."

Forgiveness

A Sunday School teacher had just concluded her lesson and wanted to make sure she had made her point. She said, “Can anyone tell me what you must do before you can obtain forgiveness of sin?”

There was a short pause and then, from the back of the room, a small boy spoke up. "Sin," he said.

Forgiveness

There is a beautiful story found in the Zohar3 — the central text of Jewish mysticism — which
illustrates this idea. Rabbi Abba, says the Zohar, once sat at the gateway to the town of Lud in
Israel, which is now the location of Ben Gurion Airport.
He saw a traveler sit down on a pile of rocks at the edge of a mountain overlooking a cliff. The
man was exhausted from his journey and immediately fell asleep. Rabbi Abba watched this
scene for a bit when suddenly he saw a deadly snake slither out of the rocks, and make its way
rapidly towards the sleeping man. Before he had time to intervene, a giant lizard jumped out
from the rocks and killed the serpent, saving the sleeping man’s life.
The man awoke, shocked to see a beheaded snake lying in front of him. He quickly gathered his
possessions and rose to continue on his journey. At that very moment the pile of rocks he was
sitting on collapsed and dropped into the ravine below.
Rabbi Abba ran after the man and recounted everything he had witnessed. He asked, "My friend,
tell me, to what do you attribute all these miracles that have just occurred?"
The traveler responded:
4
“Well, one thing I can tell you. I never go to sleep without forgiving someone who offended me.
When someone caused me pain, I always tried, with all my heart, to resolve whatever animosity
was between us. I turned the hateful situation into an opportunity to do acts of kindness for the
person involved in the misunderstanding.

Parrot in Freezer - Joke

David received a parrot for his birthday. This parrot was fully grown, with a bad attitude and worse vocabulary. David tried hard to change the bird's attitude and was constantly saying polite words, playing soft Israeli dance music, anything that came to mind. Nothing worked. He yelled at the bird, but the bird got worse. He shook the bird and the bird got madder and ruder.
Finally, in a moment of desperation, David put the parrot in the freezer. For a few moments he heard the bird squawking, kicking and screaming and then, suddenly, all was quiet. David was frightened that he might have actually hurt the bird and quickly opened the freezer door.
The parrot calmly stepped out onto David's extended arm and said, "I'm sorry that I offended you with my language and actions. I ask for your forgiveness. I will go to synagogue with you every week to pray and I will try to modify my behaviour."
David was astounded at the bird's change in attitude and was about to ask what changed him when the parrot continued, "May I ask what the chicken did?"

Shofar Erev Rosh Hashana

In the final year of his life the Minchas Elozor took the shofar on Rosh
Chodesh Elul and tried the horn to see if it was in OK condition. Hershelle
was in the room then and was very visibly excited with the shofar and its
sounds; he asked his zeide for "noch ein blooz," one more blast, which his
zeide gladly obliged. From then on, for the next month, this became a
ritual; the Rov blowing once for little Hershelle. On Erev Rosh Hashonoh
Hershelle was there awaiting his daily blast, but he was disappointed.
"Haynt iz Erev Rosh Hashoone, Haynt bloozt men nisht, morgen vet men bloozen
asach mool in shil," his zeide told him. The child knew no Chochmes. He
kicked and screamed, telling his zeide "Nor Ein Blooz! Nor Ein Blooz!" After
a while his zeide had rachmones on his favorite eynikel and took the shofar
and blew one blooz.
On Rosh Hashoneh before Tekios the minhag in Munkacs was that the Rov spoke.
That year the Rov went up before the aron kodesh, opened the ark and said:
"Ribono Shel Olam, Ich darf tshiveh tuhn, ich hub over geven af an halochoh.
It's written that on ERH one mustn't blow shofar, yet I did. He began to sob
uncontrollably and called out: Ribono shel olam, do you know why I
transgressed that halochoh? it was because my young (grand)child lay on the
floor and begged me and cried that I should only blow one blooz for him. My
heart melted, I couldn't bear to watch him cry like that, so I blew once for
him, despite the fact that I shouldn't have. Tatte, how can you stand by and
see how millions of your children are down on the floor and cry out to you,
Tatte eyn blooz - TeKa BeShofar Godol LeChayruseynu, Even if the time is not
right for it yet, the time for Moshiach has yet to arrive, but your children
cry out to you, how can you stand idly by?!"


When Reb Baruch told the story he cried, and recounted how at that time the
crowd cried along with the Rov, the Tekios were delayed, and for a long time
they could not "come to themselves, loud wailing was heard throughout the
shul." (Such stories can always be told, and one can always learn from
them.)

A Walk Through the Desert What is forgiveness?

A Walk Through the Desert What is forgiveness?

Two friends were walking through the desert. During some point of the journey they had an argument, and one friend slapped the other one in the face. The one who got slapped
was hurt, but without saying anything, wrote in the sand: TODAY MY BEST FRIEND
SLAPPED ME IN THE FACE.
They kept on walking until they found an oasis, where they decided to take a bath. The one who had been slapped got stuck in the mire and started drowning, but the friend saved him.
After he recovered from the near drowning, he wrote on a stone: TODAY MY BEST FRIEND SAVED MY LIFE.
The friend who had slapped and saved his best friend asked him, "After I hurt you, you wrote in the sand and now, you write on a stone, why?"
The other friend replied "When someone hurts us we should write it down in sand where winds of forgiveness can erase it away. But, when someone does something good for us, we must engrave it in stone where no wind can ever erase it."

LEARN TO WRITE YOUR HURTS IN THE SAND - FORGIVE AND FORGET - AND TO CARVE YOUR BENEFITS IN STONE.